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        <title><![CDATA[The Daily Beast - Andy Borowitz]]></title>
        <description><![CDATA[The latest blogs, stories, and Buzz Board picks from Andy Borowitz]]></description>
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        <lastBuildDate><![CDATA[Mon, 06 Jul 2009 08:26:18 -0400]]></lastBuildDate>
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            <title><![CDATA[What Bernie Should Read in Jail]]></title>
            <link><![CDATA[http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2009-07-06/what-bernie-should-read-in-jail/]]></link>
            <description><![CDATA[As the Ponzi king heads to prison, he suddenly has a lot of time on his hands. Andy Borowitz recommends five books that should keep him busy for the next 150 years.
The Count of Monte Cristoby Alexandre Dumas
There's a lot for Bernie to savor in this...]]></description>
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            <pubDate><![CDATA[Mon, 06 Jul 2009 08:26:17 -0400]]></pubDate>
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            <title><![CDATA[The Cheney Media Blitz You Didn't See]]></title>
            <link><![CDATA[http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2009-05-15/the-cheney-media-blitz-you-didnt-see/]]></link>
            <description><![CDATA[Have you noticed that Dick Cheney seems to be everywhere these days? Comedian Andy Borowitz sure has. He tracks the former VP's recent media appearances, from his slam dunks to his racy topless photos.











Xtra Insight: Run, Dick,...]]></description>
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            <pubDate><![CDATA[Fri, 15 May 2009 06:34:33 -0400]]></pubDate>
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            <title><![CDATA[Ashley Dupr&eacute; in Exile]]></title>
            <link><![CDATA[http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2009-04-22/ashley-dupre-one-year-later/]]></link>
            <description><![CDATA[This week's Newsweek cover story unfortunately focused on the least interesting person in the Eliot Spitzer sex scandal: Eliot Spitzer. As a public service, satirist Andy Borowitz has fabricated the following profile of the significantly more...]]></description>
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            <pubDate><![CDATA[Wed, 22 Apr 2009 16:28:36 -0400]]></pubDate>
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            <title><![CDATA[Shabbat Sha-Lohan!]]></title>
            <link><![CDATA[http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2009-04-07/shabbat-sha-lohan/]]></link>
            <description><![CDATA[Lindsay Lohan even tried converting to Judaism to save her relationship with Samantha Ronson. No surprise, says Andy Borowitz: Her movies are filled with subtle but rich Talmudic themes.
Just when we were getting used to the idea that Lindsay Lohan...]]></description>
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            <pubDate><![CDATA[Tue, 07 Apr 2009 21:14:55 -0400]]></pubDate>
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            <title><![CDATA[Heinous Investment Advice]]></title>
            <link><![CDATA[http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2009-03-23/heinous-investment-advice/]]></link>
            <description><![CDATA[Some foolproof rules for the savvy investor: Hiding money in mattresses is too risky. Mothers can't be trusted. And the average dog can beat the S&P 500.
If you're one of those people who'd rather hide their money under a mattress than give it to an...]]></description>
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            <pubDate><![CDATA[Mon, 23 Mar 2009 19:41:41 -0400]]></pubDate>
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            <title><![CDATA[How Big Is Obama's Package?]]></title>
            <link><![CDATA[http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2009-01-09/how-big-is-obamas-package/]]></link>
            <description><![CDATA['A personal matter,' says president-elect.
At a press conference in Washington today, President-elect Barack Obama repeatedly refused to answer questions about the size of his package, calling the subject "a personal matter."
Again and again,...]]></description>
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            <pubDate><![CDATA[Fri, 09 Jan 2009 12:29:53 -0400]]></pubDate>
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            <title><![CDATA[Buzz Board Pick - Music]]></title>
            <link><![CDATA[http://www.thedailybeast.com/beast-board/item/853///]]></link>
            <description><![CDATA[The next great band to come out of Austin is Ringo Deathstarr. With a name that good, their music has a lot to live up to, and it does. Their post-punk sound might remind you of The Jesus and Mary Chain or, more recently, Black Rebel Motorcycle Club,...]]></description>
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            <pubDate><![CDATA[Mon, 01 Jun 2009 07:49:10 -0400]]></pubDate>
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